Friday, September 19, 2008
P.S. Fuck You Matt.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
*As before, the name of my friend has been changed to protect their identity*
me: How are you doing? God, here we go. Time to keep up appearances.
ShNiki: phew...phew? What do you really do? what aday. but i am good and yourself?
sounds like you are having a great time!
me: not bad I just wasted a ton of my time I really did...
and I actually need to get stuff done today I really do PAUSEnot
ShNiki: what did you waste your time doing?
me: walking around talking about shit that I am going to be doing anyway
I am a 26 year old man working with all 55+ women
who do you think is going to be moving all this shit?
ShNiki: mmm...so you are the burly lacky? burly? Did we go to sleep and wake up in the 40's?
me: yes, yes I am
What happened in your day?
Shniki: well there was a video/teleconfernce that i had to take care of because the representative from our company is in France pussies, and all the people that were in the meeting here were from other companies, so I was the face of the group and the contact person
me: wow that sounds like fun Take me now.
look at you putting those limited resources you were born with to good use. Oh shit, I better put something else here being the face of something
ShNiki: i know. Feel the jealous!
lol usually not a good thing! Look at me, look at me, please, compliment me.
me: so what else happened? *Dismissive wanking motion*
ShNiki: well it was a four hour meeting so i had to take care of the copies, video/teleconference logistics, the food, the going to the store to get more sodas the cleaning up along with all the other asinine things that people give me. Such as people who have been here longer than me and do the same job i do HOLY SHIT, you are still typing? not knowing what the difference between the bypass tray and tray 1
me: so basically you work with monkeys? This is what we in the "biz" call "throwing them a bone"
ShNiki: ya. with phd's
me: Wow Well. You slept with someone to get that job.
ShNiki: yep. be jealous of me
me: oh I am very jealous God, this is brutal. How can I get out of this? OOOH OOH, got it.
any plans for tonight or the weekend?
ShNiki: uhm? why?
Because I am writing a fucking report on what boring people do with their free time.
me: just asking
ShNiki: well, tonight not so much *shocked, friday, not so much *shocked, saturday i have a birthday party Yes yes, a "birthday party" read: not so much
and you? DAMMIT, I fell into that one. How do I avoid THIS...aannndddd ignore.
me: Whose birthday is it?
ShNiki: My friend Becca "friend". You used to play B-ball <--Who are you, the Fresh Prince?with her bro. Quincy, but we have talked about him before and you don't remember him I barely remember who you are, why should I remember that asshole?
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
That makes me so sad that if I had a monkey I would spank it every time I saw that. Also I know that this is a moot point because only 1 or 2 people actually read this regularly but if you do happen to stumble across it please leave a comment. Google is reading the web page and it thinks we are interested in this stuff.As I have said before, St. Boringville is a town that accepts and welcomes with open arms all people from all walks of life. If you are a man and you want to wear a pouch thong *shudder then who am I to stop you? Who am I to call you a gay faggot queer who reigns over gay kingdom as High Queen of butt pirates and fudge packers? Who am I to say that you disgust me and that they should, along with the blacks and the Jews, stick you all on an island somewhere. NO GOOD SIRS, that is not my place to tell you something like that so you keep on wearing what you want to.
But for the love of god can we make another post the most popular so I don't have to keep looking at that queer shit everyday.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Friday, September 12, 2008
csamal (1:03:41 PM): hes gay
csamal (1:03:44 PM): how bout that?
Guate8 (1:04:13 PM): thanks for stroking the ol' ego
Guate8 (1:04:56 PM): (yeah, thats it, stroke it, stroke it, ssstttrrrrooookkkkkeeee iiitttt *falls asleep with cigarette dangling out of mouth)
csamal (1:05:23 PM): wow
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
*even whinier pissier voice* Well I am a vegan
Monday, September 1, 2008
I mean, I have seen it once and it was OK. I enjoyed the visual aspect of it but people bust nuts over this thing. I just don't get it. You can always tell who is on the brink of orgasm over this movie too. Next time you are in a social situation just say, "You know what I thought was an overrated movie? The Nightmar....." At this point, you should experience what feels like a light breeze brushing against your face. This is actually not the result of being in a drafty room rather the very small fist of a very dainty man who you have just deeply and personally offended.
Seriously though, these people act like they were on the set and gave advice to Henry Selick and were in Tim Burton's studio while he conceived the whole thing. Seriously people, take your hand out of your pants, clean up the mess and stop giving such a damn about something that you in no part helped to create.